How to Live on 24 Hours a Day

I took a hike to the top of a 6,000-foot ridge one summer. It had a great view of the 14,000-foot extinct volcano 20 miles away. Hailing from a state where the elevation tops off at 1,000 feet, experience had to teach me the counter-intuitive fact that a mountain looks bigger the higher you get.
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This ‘n That

LIGHT READING

In this commentary (The solitary bliss of life as an introvert) from the early days right after Quiet was published, Michael Deacon ponders whether the supreme being is an introvert or an extrovert, and adds his 2¢ on aging into introversion. Don’t miss the comments.

JOB HUNTING

As for me, I’ve been performing job searches on the keyword “alone.” When I find it, it’s usually preceded by “looking for someone who works well…” and I get all excited. That’s me! But no. In every single post, it’s also followed by “or in a group.” Sheesh. Flip-floppers.

FILM MAKING

In case you haven’t heard, Elaine Aron has revamped her website, and is fundraising for a film on HSPs. She has already exceeded her goal, but has promised to apply any additional funds to making a better documentary. Only 3 days to go, so visit soon.

WANTED: PATRON (or matron, I’m not picky)

Would anyone like to pay me to spend my time researching whatever I feel curious about today, and then writing about it in multiple blogs? That’s what I really want to do with my life, but all this annoying need-to-pay-rent crap keeps getting in the way :(

Down Time Illuminated

Whether it's from being an HSP or an introvert, or both, the gigantic mismatch between the amount of down time I seem to need, and the actual time I have left after working and running a household continues to be a major issue. Continue reading

Listening Underneath

When I was in my teens, I became aware that I experienced a certain kind of connection with some people, but not with others. When I met someone, I “listened underneath” (as I thought of it), and if I couldn’t perceive them that way, was unlikely to feel that we had much in common.

I had forgotten all about listening underneath until recently. Continue reading

Valueless Lesson

A blank mask without a face behind itIt’s so annoying to have to leave a job just when you’re getting good at it. I’d like to at least know what happened with my boss. I have the distinct impression our conflict was about something other than it appeared to be. Unfortunately, Mr. Not So Nice After All Guy isn’t owning up. Is that fair? Yeah, yeah, life ain’t. That doesn’t mean I have to like it.

Supposedly, HSPs have superior intuitive and empathetic perception. I’m not entirely convinced on that point. I have been told more than once that I discerned things a person didn’t even recognize about him/herself, usually long after the fact (and mostly by water signs, but that’s another post). On the other hand, I seem to be singularly blind to red flags in an employment context. Continue reading

To Those Who Put Themselves Out There

Well, the axe fell. I’m a little frazzled, but feeling better about it than I expected. In fact, I’m feeling grateful – to all the HSPs and introverts who show themselves through videos and books and blogs and interviews, to help me learn that I can still feel OK about myself, even in moments like this.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

Taking Shape – HSP/Introversion & Social Life

daffodils in bloomI’ve been busy with my new job (which is, happily, working out), so I haven’t had time to do more than think about being an HSP/introvert lately. Nevertheless, I can feel my understanding of both evolving. I’m beginning to see probable HSPs and introverts in my daily environment, as well as to identify them in the memories of my past interactions. It gives me a better understanding of other peoples’ motivations and responses, as well as of my own. I don’t know if I necessarily feel better about people I had conflicts with, but those conflicts feel less personal. I realize that they really didn’t comprehend how I experience things at all. And I didn’t understand that they didn’t understand.

I’m also beginning to perceive at least a little about how introversion and high sensory processing sensitivity are different, especially in the area of interactions. Continue reading

Ode to the Introvert

Headshot of poet Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy" Movers and shakers. Who appears on your mindscreen when you hear that phrase? Corporate CEOs? Elected officials? Activist film stars? In other words, extroverts. Or at the very least, skilled extrovert emulators.

But if we look at the first verse of Ode, in which 19th century poet Arthur William Edgar O’Shaughnessy coined that phrase, he seems to be describing an entirely different sort of person:

We are the music makers,
And we are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams;—
World-losers and world-forsakers,
On whom the pale moon gleams:
Yet we are the movers and shakers
Of the world for ever, it seems.

Wandering alone in nature? World losing and forsaking? In other words, introverts. And what’s more, loners!

If you read the entire poem, Continue reading

Time Trials

I’m happy to report I’ve found additional work. Less happily, two months in, I’m hearing something I’ve heard too many times before: “Less depth, more speed.”
animated clock face with spinning hands
I’ll bet this is something HSP/introverts hear a lot.

I was hoping to avoid that in this job, as I’ve previously worked with my new boss, and he praised my detail-orientedness. But that was when someone else was paying for my time, and more importantly, my thoroughness – or not – had no impact on his workload.

The thing is, I can’t work more superficially. Engagement doesn’t have a volume dial for me. It’s either on or off. If I care at all about the work (which is essential), I have to give it my full attention. That’s the only kind of attention I’ve got.

Engagement isn’t the only issue. Continue reading

The Other Half

My preschool induction into non-introverted chattiness has had its costs. For instance, I’m in my 50s and still figuring out who I am (see Once upon a time, I thought I knew who I was).

But I’ve mostly been spared the experiences that make so many other introverts seriously pissed off at extroverts. One thing introverts say over and over in blogs and videos is that you simply can’t make extroverts understand introversion. I haven’t yet had to try, so I can’t speak to that. But I had an experience recently that made me wonder whether that doesn’t cut both ways. Continue reading